Spiders

Some people have rational fears like the fear of drowning or speaking in public. But when people ask me what I'm most nervous about in relation to going to Honduras, the first thing that inevitably comes to my mind is something very irrational. Sure I think about the difficulties of adjusting to a new culture and fitting into my community, dealing with poverty, strange food and all the other normal things to be just a little unsure about. But what I can't help shake in my mind is my hopeless fear of SPIDERS.

If I were to be logical about it, I'd reason that car accidents or heart disease kill many millions more people a year than spiders do. Logic would have me conclude that I should be deathly afraid of driving and butter and cigarettes instead of insects that are one one hundredth my size that mostly just want to avoid me. But tell logic to shove it because it can't see how creepy spiders are with their many beady eyes and their hairy legs and their fangs and the way they crawl and the way they surprise you then disappear when you look away. Yes, I'm like a six year old, I'll admit it.

Once during a mission trip in Bolivia, I stepped into the shower (which is one of those few places where you're completely exposed- both figuratively and literally) and found a Huge tarantula just chilling on the wall, staring at me with all its eyes. Okay, it was probably a normal-sized one, but it seemed big at the time. Also, I'm pretty sure I saw it lick its lips as it watched me step into its lair. So what could I do? I froze at first to make sure it wasn't going to jump on me and bite me in the face then I slowly backed away, put my clothes back on and called my friend to look too. Needless to say, I didn't take a shower that day. The spider won that round.

Seriously though, I'm sure that spiders won't be a real problem for me in the long run. I probably won't see very many and when I do, I'll try to man up and shoo them away. 'Check your shoes before you put them on,' they say. But thinking about Honduran spiders is just one of those crazy obsessions that you can't help avoid when you're preparing yourself mentally for what lies ahead. I just hope I don't have any more in my shower this time!